life is a blank canvas & I’m gonna make it so colourful

that it’ll blind you.

damn am I pumped. So I kinda wasted my day, yes, but I guess once in a while we all have our off-days, when The Lazy Song becomes our theme song.

Last night I checked my results, like a week after everyone else. I was telling Ma, who was behind me : “Oh. Results. Whatever. 一 定 是 3.5 . I don’t care anymore.’

so my cumulative GPA still sucks thanks to my very first term’s results, but this term’s GPA was seriously…unexpected. I joked that they must’ve mixed it up with someone else’s, like for my PSLE. Damn, 6 years on and nobody has noticed? I got away scot-free. My O level results are definitely mine though, so sucky.

Is it luck or? I mean, honestly. Things are going pretty well now, and I hope they stay this way, but it scares me sometimes. Like if things go too well, they’ll be taken away. Irrational fears, I know, but I can’t help it.

Then again I’ve suffered a fair bit too, maybe I  DO deserve to be happy now.

So I decided to do what I usually end up doing when I’m bored – plan my life.

LMU Munich seems like a good choice. Thomas Mann was affiliated somehow (Wiki didn’t explain), I know at least 3 people who’ve lived in Munich for a period of time, and they say it’s Chinese-friendly and safe. The only thing is that it costs more to live there than elsewhere, like say, Berlin.

Sadly I’ll need to get to a C2 level, which is mad, unless I do intensive courses like Johnathan and Bertrand. Thing is…they’re doing Med, I think, which makes sense, but I don’t even know what major I want to take.

Sorbonne might be a better choice. I’m pretty confident I can get an okay score for DELF B2 by next year, and who knows, maybe I’ll take the DALF. But for absolutely superficial reasons, I prefer Germany.

New York is the place to go for career ops, but I really don’t think I’d fit in with the Americans. :/

looking at the UN site for career options, seems cool to work there. 

damn I don’t know what I want to do but I know that I want to do SO MANY THINGS.

yesterday at the briefing for the KK trip I felt like tearing up. I was like damn it seems tough but I’m gonna do this.

Family members seem to think I’m mentally and physically weak, but my mum is the only one who knows. She knows that in the most crucial of moments, I’ll pull through and surprise everyone. & that I’ll take care of my own matters, even though it seems like I don’t care and I’m inept at the most basic life skills.

the sparks didn’t fly for a reason but hey, everything makes for a good gossip session or two. In about a week or so I’ll shake my head and laugh at my idiocy.

Gotta keep my life on track now…

it’s a bit late, but I realised that what Faarooq said that day was right. Guess Ma pampers me too much.

I’ve decided to stop relying on them financially and spending $ without sparing a single thought. I quit my job at the library, so. I’ll figure some other way out. I probably can’t work at a retail store now, they require like 20 hours a week.

Maybe I’ll…I don’t know.

Been thinking about all the Teen Vogue advice, so that day I woke up and thought, it’s time to post a look! Spent quite a while figuring out my outfit, which I rarely do.

I was like : okay the focus here has to be the leggings. Which pair? & I went for the tie-dye.

Then I thought, alright, with tie-dye we have a carefree, hippie vibe. So which skirt will match that? I picked the brown fringey cowgirl looking one.

Since I already had fringes, I thought the black fringed vest would go great, along with a cool singlet. Added rings and a colourful necklace, plus a flower in my hair and…

 what is this.

whatever I wrote got deleted. 😦 too lazy to rewrite

 

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